Today I am going to share with you dear readers a little something I learned when I entered this community over a decade ago as an unattached bottom/subbiegirl. That's right peeps! I wasn't identifying as a Top/Dom/MagnamousGoddess at the time.

Anyhow ~ One of the BEST things my elders taught me was that if you were looking at someone as a possible partner, it never hurt to ask around about them and observe them to be sure they were what I thought. Easy enough in some ways, but challenging in others - as I was new and without all the resources I have on hand today...

I learned to not only asking the person in question's friends but also the people who were not fond of them. Friends tend to be biased and enemies tend to tell their truths. It was through practing this techinique as a bottom that I learned the value it would bring me as a top. I still do this before truly befriending people because of how attached I get to those I choose to call friends. [It's a million times worse for those who try to become a Snake, I promise.]

I also do it for my friends when they are looking at new people to play with. The HUGE difference now -- I have contacts all over the damn world to pull from. Knowing tons of people helps me sooooooooooo much.

Right now I am doing one for a young lady here in town. She's seeing someone who relocated to Houston, but has a history in his former location with a group I have heard others mention. So I dropped about ten notes. My contacts are doing their homework, as I write.

Hopefully all I will get back are glowing reports. I truly want this person to be what he seems. I have already warned him about my jaded opinions of male dominants and that I am approaching the whole thing with skepticism. Guess we will all have to wait and see.

I have another friend I am considering doing this for, but I doubt she will listen. She tends to ignore all warning signs once she has her mind set on something. MAYBE her history was just bad luck. MAYBE it wasn't because she made rash choices in where to invest her love. Maybe she HAS learned even though she's not done any exercises to reflect on the common points of dismay and what traits she tolerates that always cause this unrest - not to mention her responsiblity in picking those jerks. MAYBE...

And maybe the sky is purple today. I haven't looked out the window yet. I could be wrong~

Lv M